Opioid Addiction ~

  Hello dear readers and welcome or welcome back to my blog today while still focusing on the topic of addictions I wanted to delve into Opioid addition and dependence being one of the more serious and common addictions among people in the U.S. more than 200,000 cases of deaths of caused by opiates alone just in the U.S. not including other outlying territories, but those places are still important, and still have opioid epidemics happening that need awareness, empathy and overall kindness when handling individuals in recovery from opioid addiction and dependency. 

Opioid addiction and dependence: 

Physical and psychological reliance on opioids, a substance found in certain prescription pain medications and illegal drugs like heroin. 

Opioids are prescribed to treat pain. With prolonged use, pain-relieving effects may lessen and pain can become worse. In addition, the body can develop dependency on opioids. Opioid dependency causes withdrawal symptoms, which makes it difficult to stop taking them. Addiction occurs when dependency interferes with daily life. Taking more than the prescribed amount or using illegal opioids like heroin may result in death. 

*Usually self-diagnosable 💟

(Consult with your local medical professionals or authorities for medical crisis//advice)

How Opioid addiction Occurs:

Opioid use -- even short term -- can lead to addiction and, too often overdose and death. Anyone who takes opioids is at risk of developing addiction. Your personal history and length of time you use opioids plays a role, but it's impossible to predict who's vulnerable to eventual dependence on and abuse of these drugs. Legal or illegal, stolen or shared, these drugs are responsible for the majority of overdose and deaths in the U.S. today. Addiction is a condition in which somethin that started as pleasurable now feels like something you can't live without. Doctor's define drug addiction as an irresistible craving for a drug, out-of-control and compulsive use of the drug, and continued use of the drug despite repeated, harmful consequences. Opioids are highly addictive, in large part because they activate powerful reward centers in your brain. 

Opioids trigger the release of endorphins, your brain's feel-good neurotransmitters. Endorphins muffle your perception of pain and boost feelings of pleasure, creating a temporary but powerful sense of well-being. When an opioid dose wears off, you may find yourself wanting those good feelings back, as soon as possible. This is the first milestone on the path toward potential addiction. 

Short-term VS Long-term Effects:

When you take opioids repeatedly over time, your body slows it's production of endorphins. The same dose of opioids stops triggering such a strong flood of good feelings. This is called tolerance. One reason opioid addiction is so common is that people who develop tolerance may feel driven to increase their dose so they keep feeling the same effect. 

Because doctors today are acutely aware of opioid risks, it's often difficult to get your doctor to increase your dose, or even renew your prescription. Some opioid users who believe they need an increased supply turn, at this point, to illegally obtained opioids or heroin. Some illegally obtained drugs, such as fentanyl (Actiq, Duragesic, Fentora), are laced with contaminants, or much more powerful opioids. Because of the potency of fentanyl, this particular combination has been associated with significant deaths in those using heroin. 

If you're taking opioids and you've developed tolerance, ask your doctor for help. There are  other, safer choices available to help you make a change towards healing yourself, and continue feeling well. Don't stop opioid medications without a doctor's help. Quitting these drugs abruptly can cause severe side effects, including pain worse than it was before you started taking opioids. Your doctor can help you taper off opioids slowly and safely. 

Opioid Addiction Risk Factors:

Opioids are most addictive when you take them using methods different from what was prescribed, such as crushing a pill so that it can be snorted or injected. This life-threatening practice is even more dangerous if the pill is a long- or extended-acting formulation. Rapidly delivering all the medicine to your body can cause accidental overdose. Taking more than your prescribed dose of opioid medication, or more often than prescribed, also increases your risk of addiction.

The length of time you use prescribed opioids also plays a role. Researchers have found that taking opioid medications for more than a few days increases your risk of addiction. The odds you'll still be on opioids a year after starting a short course increase after only five days on opioids. 

A number of additional factors -- genetic, psychological, and environmental -- play a role in addiction, which can happen quickly or after many years of opioid use.

Known risk factors of opioid misuse and addiction include, but are not limited to: 

*Poverty

*Unemployment 

*Family history of substance abuse 

*Personal history of substance abuse

*Young age

*History of criminal activity or legal problems including DUIs.

*Regular contact with high-risk people or high-risk environments.

*Problems with past employers, family members and friends 

*History of mental health disorder(s)

*Risk-taking or thrill-seeking behavior

*Heavy tobacco use

*Stressful circumstances 

*Prior drug or alcohol rehabilitation 

In addition, women have a unique set of risk factors for opioid addiction. Women are more likely than men to have chronic pain. Compared with men, women are also more likely to be prescribed opioid medications, to be given higher doses and use opioids for longer periods of time. Women may also have biological tendencies to become dependent on prescription pain relievers more quickly than men are. 

Steps to Prevent Opioid Addiction:

Opioids are safest when used for three or fewer days to manage acute pain, such as pain that follows surgery or a bone fracture. If you need opioids for acute pain, work with your doctor to take the lowest dose possible, for the shortest time needed, exactly as prescribed. 

If you're living with chronic pain, opioids are not likely to be a safe and effective long-term treatment option. Many other treatments are available, including less-addictive pain medications and nonpharmacological therapies. Aim for a treatment plan that makes it possible to enjoy your life without opioids, if possible.

Help prevent addiction in your family and community by safeguarding opioid medications while you use them and disposing of unused opioids properly. Contact your local law enforcement agency, your trash and recycling service, or the Drug Enforcement Administration (DEA) for information about local medication takeback programs. If no takeback program is available in your area, consult your local pharmacist for guidance. 

The most important step you can take to prevent opioid addiction? 

Recognize that no one is safe, and we all play a role in tackling the grip these drugs currently hold on our loved ones and communities.

What to do in an Emergency and How to get Help:

An opioid overdose can be reversed with the drug Naloxone when given right away. Improvements have seen in some regions of the country in the form of decreasing availability of prescription opioid pain relievers and decreasing misuse among the nation's teen's. However 2011, overdose deaths involving heroin increased dramatically. Fortunately, effective medications exist to treat opioid addiction, including methadone, buprenorphine, and naltrexone. 

A NIDA study found that ounce treatment is initiated, both a buprenorphine/naloxone combination and extended release naltrexone formulation are similarly effective in treating opioid addiction. However, naltrexone requires full detoxification, so initiating treatment among active users was more difficult. These medications help many people recover from opioid addiction. Opioid-involved overdose deaths rose significantly from 46,802 deaths in 2018 to 49,860 in 2019...just 12 months alone and almost 50,000 lives gone to ONE addiction.

If you or someone you know is struggling with an addiction and is an need of help SAMHSA Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration is a free, confidential, 24/7, 365- day - a - year treatment referral and information service (in English and Spanish) for individuals and families facing mental and/or substance use disorders 

Call: 1-800-662-4357 (HELP) 

If you are in the middle of a crisis or the person you are calling for is in crisis and in need of immediate help please don't hesitate and call 911 or your local law enforcement. 

I hope I've been able to help someone today, maybe you're in the middle of addiction, or maybe you know someone who is. Maybe you're in recovery or just fell off the wagon for the fourth time. I get it, I've been there I've actually been in all of those scenarios and now I am a few years into recovery, and I am living for it everyday. I wake up without regrets, with my memory intake and with my dignity in the morning and I can stand to see the person looking back at me in the mirror as I'm getting ready. Who I am today is a completely, and utterly different person from who I was 4 or 5 years ago, but the healing has to start from within, and once you start healing, learning and growing into the person that the drugs have suppressed for so long you begin to see the world through the eyes of a child again and you get all those good feelings back, but better.. it's so much better. Don't just sit here and listen to me talk about it, go experience the beauty of life through sobriety and recovery yourself! 

Until next time --

Cheers,

Averi

Gambling ~

Hello dear readers and welcome or welcome back to my blog. Today I want to focus on gambling addiction, and how it is the most common impulse control disorder worldwide despite the toll it takes on one's life mentally, financially and emotionally. Gambling is addictive because it stimulates the brain's reward system much like drug's and alcohol, and it is an uncontrollable urge to continue gambling. 

Lets look into this disorder and try to share some light on it and hopefully some courage for those possibly struggling with this disorder. 

Gam-ble 

/'gambel/

verb

gerund or present participle: gambling 

1. play games of chance for money, bet. 

2. take risky action in hope of a desired result. 

                       Overview

Compulsive gambling, also called gambling disorder, is the uncontrollable urge to keep gambling despite the toll it takes on your life. Gambling means that you're willing to risk something you value i.e. friendships, family members, homes, vehicles, and other personal belongings in hope of getting something of even greater value. 

Gambling can stimulate the brain's reward system much like drugs and alcohol can, leading to addiction. If you have a problem with compulsive gambling, you may continually chase bets that lead to losses, hide your behavior, despite savings, accumulate debt, or even resort to theft of fraud to support your addiction. 

compulsive gambling is a serious condition that can destroy lives. Although treating compulsive gambling can be challenging, many people who struggle with compulsive gambling have found help through professional treatment. 

                        Symptoms 

Signs and symptoms of compulsive gambling (gambling disorder) include, but are not limited to: 

*Being preoccupied with gambling, such as constantly planning how to get more gambling money

*Needing to gamble with increasing amounts of money to get the same thrill 

*Trying to control, or cut back or even stop gambling, but without success 

*Feeling restless or irritable when you try to cut down on gambling 

*Gambling to escape problems or relieve feelings of hopelessness, guilt, anxiety, or depression

*Trying to get back lost money by gambling more (chasing losses)

*Lying to family members or others to hide the extent of your gambling 

*Jeopardizing or losing important relationships, a job, or school work opportunities because of gambling 

*Resorting to theft or fraud to get gambling money 

*Asking others to bail you out of financial trouble because you gambled money away 

Unlike most casual gamblers who stop when losing or set a loss limit, people with a compulsive gambling problem are compelled to keep playing to recover their money -- a pattern that becomes increasingly destructive over time. 

Some people with compulsive gambling problem may have remission where they gamble less or not at all for a period of time. However, without treatment, remission usually isn't permanent. 

      When to see a doctor or a mental health professional:

Have family members, friends or co-workers expressed concern about your gambling? If so, listen to their worries because denial is almost always a feature of compulsive or addictive behavior, it may be difficult for you to realize that you have a problem, however if you recognize your own behavior from that list of signs and symptoms for compulsive gambling, seek professional help. 

                                                                   Causes

Exactly what causes someone to gamble compulsively isn't well-understood... Like many mental disorders/addictions, compulsive gambling may result from a combination of a biological, genetic and environmental factors.

                                                             Risk Factors

Although most people who play cards or wager never develop a gambling problem, certain factors are more often associated with compulsive gambling. 

*Mental health disorders. People who gamble compulsively often have substance abuse problems, personality disorders, depression, or anxiety. Compulsive gambling may also be associated with bipolar disorder, obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) or attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) 

*Age. Compulsive gambling is more common in younger and middle aged people. Gambling during childhood or the teenage years increases the risk of developing compulsive gambling. However, compulsive gambling in the older adult population can also be a problem. 

*Sex. Compulsive gambling is more common in men than women Women who gamble typically start later in life and may become addicted more quickly. But gambling patterns among men and women have become increasingly similar.

*Family or friend influence. If your family members or friends have a gambling problem, the chances are greater that you will, too. 

*Medications used to treat Parkinson's disease and restless legs syndrome. Drugs called dopamine agonist have a rare side effect that may result in compulsive behaviors, including gambling, in some people.

*Certain personality characteristics. Being highly competitive, a workaholic, impulsive, restless or easily bored may increase your risk of compulsive gambling. 

                          Complications

 Compulsive gambling can have profound and long-lasting consequences for your life, such as, but not limited to: 

*Relationship problems

*Financial problems, including bankruptcy

*Legal Problems or Imprisonment 

*Poor work performance or job repeat job losses 

*Suicide, suicide attempts, suicidal thoughts or ideations. 

Although there's no proven way to prevent a gambling problem, educational programs that target individuals and groups at increased risk may be helpful. 

If you have risk factors for compulsive gambling, consider avoiding gambling in any form, people who gamble and places where gambling occurs. Get treatment at the earliest signs of a problem. Don't wait. 

             Understanding the problem --

you cant fix something that you don't understand. To eliminate gambling from your life, you must first learn about the issue and you have a gambling addiction. About 2.6% of the population (that's about 10 million people in the United States) that have a gambling problems and experienced some kind of hardships associated with their gambling problem. 

Something that is really disheartening to me as just as a human being in recovery from drugs and alcohol is all of the current media ads promoting gambling, alcohol deliver etc.. As someone who is trying with their entire being to live a clean solid life seeing things like this every time I have to watch a commercial or ad on my phone is just not fair to me, and it doesn't take into consideration how it makes the family of the compulsive gamblers feel. I really feel like the media needs to rethink what, and who they're promoting. 

If you or a loved one is struggling with compulsive gambling and would like help and treatment there is the National Council on Problem Gambling. They have a phone number you can call, messenger board where you can chat with one of their professionals or you can text with a professional 24 Hours Confidentially 7 days a week. 

Call | 1-800-522-4700

Chat | ncpgambling.org/chat

Text | 1-800-522-4700

If you or a loved is struggling with suicidal thoughts or ideations you can reach out to National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 24 hours 7 days a week. 

Call | 1-800-273-8256

Chat | icdepreventionlife.org/chat

I sincerely hope with this entry you've been able to learn about gambling, maybe you found some of the signs and symptoms were relative to you, or maybe you're the loved one of someone with a gambling addiction. Wherever you are in this process just know you aren't alone there is a lot of help available and most importantly you are important so do the work. 

Until next time, take good care of yourself and each other. 

Cheers, 

A 💫

Heartbreak ~

   Hello dear readers and welcome or welcome back to my blog I'm Averi and today I want to talk about heartbreak, yes you heard me right...heartbreak in the month of chocolates and flowers and full of love.

Well friends for some of us this month might not be full of flowers or chocolates or, even love. 

Some of you may be single, going through a breakup or possibly have lost recently lost a partner due to illness, divorce, etc.

 - whatever you're experiencing it is real. It is okay to feel that way, it will get better.

How To Heal After a Broken Heart:

If you have the capacity to love, then you also have the capacity to be hurt. In fact, anytime you open yourself up to love, you risk getting a broken heart. Heartbreak can hit suddenly and with a lot of force. It is possible to experience heartbreak and then find healing afterward, trust me it can be hard to put into words what a broken heart feels like. Entity explains it well:

"Heartbreak is the overwhelming distress you feel after a [romantic relationship or friendship] ends. It can make someone feel depressed or like they don't have the energy for their normal routine. And in serious cases, it can even make someone feel like they don't want to live anymore at all".

The emotional intensity of your heartbreak can and probably will vary from day to day. But some days and seasons are more overwhelming than others. If you experience any of the following, you should get support, and help to lessen the strain of your emotional pain.

*Depression, anxiety, or any other signs of mental distress

*Feeling such pain that you harm yourself (or think about doing so)

*Thoughts or plans of suicide 

*Isolation from friends, family, or activities you once loved

This list of feelings is by no means exhaustive. The way you experience a broken heart depends on the type of pain you're feeling. If a breakup has left you feeling despair, you may have different emotional struggles from someone who is brokenhearted from grieving after a loss.

Heartbreak and The Body:

your body also feels the effects of heartbreak. Because it thinks you're in physical pain, you're body releases lots of stress hormones. Sometimes you feel tired without reason, or perhaps you lose your appetite, yup that's those stress hormones. 

You may feel excessive tension or numbness. Crying is normal. But be on the lookout for crying spells out of nowhere. If your heartbreak makes you feel ill, or causes you physical pain, it's another sign you need to get help. 

Help For Your Heartbreak:

There's no need to feel ashamed or embarrassed, or even regretful of your heartbreak. The painful situation that caused was real and legitimate, and so are the emotions you do battle with. But you're not alone - and healing your heart is possible.

It begins with knowing, since knowing is you're being. Once you know the source of your pain then you can make a practical plan with people you trust to care for the needs that have unmet since your heartbreak. This spiritual, physical, and emotional Self Care will be instrumental in helping you move forward in healing. 

Talk to your doctor if your symptoms don't improve or worsen, or if you have severe depression or crying spells you cannot control. Depending on the severity of depression after a breakup, your doctor may recommend counseling or psychotherapy to help you cope with your heartbreak, especially if you've had suicidal thoughts. 

Ways to cope with heartbreak that doesn't involve the help of a professional include: 

*Exercise | Physical activity can strengthen your immune system and boost your energy, Exercise also increases your body's production of endorphins, which can improve your mood, Aim for 30 minutes of physical activity at least three times a week.

*Keep Busy | Explore hobbies and keep your mind occupied. If you're feeling depressed read a book, go for a walk, or start a project around the house. 

*Get plenty of shut eye | Getting plenty of sleep can also improve your mental well-being and help you cope after a breakup. 

*Herbal and natural remedies | If you don't want to take a prescription medication, ask your doctor about supplements used for depression, such as St. John's Wort S-adenosylmethionine, or SAMe and omega 3 fatty acids in the form of fish oils. Some supplements can't be combined with prescription medication, so make sure to consult with your prescribing physician beforehand. You can also explore alternative therapies for depression, such as acupuncture, massage therapy and meditation.

Getting Support After a Breakup:

Getting support through a breakup is easier when you receive support from family and friends. You don't have to go through this alone, so surround yourself with positive people who encourage you. If you're feeling lonely or scared, call or text a loved one and make social plans, if you aren't a social creature, but you're still feeling lonely call or text a loved one to check in or plan a zoom call. 

Avoid negative people who may judge or criticize you. This can worsen depression and make it harder for you to heal after a breakup. 

You can also fight loneliness and depression after a breakup by cultivating new friendships and reconnecting with old friends. Get together with a few co-workers for lunch or dinner, or get involved in your community to meet new people. Join a club, take a class, or volunteer in your spare time. 

Even if your depression isn't severe enough for psychotherapy. It may be helpful to join a support group. Look for breakup and divorce support groups near your home, or choose a support group for mental illness and depression. You'll most likely meet people who've gone through the same experience or are going through similar experiences, plus learn techniques to cope with your emotions.

Love Hurts... even the loveliest of love hurts. All love stories have their fair share of ugly in them. There is no such thing as a happy ending, and if you can find someone who you can put up with until the day you both check out then you are seriously one of the luckiest humans alive. I hope with my whole being that I have been able to help someone today with this advice or these words, I know your pain is immense but so is your strength. Stand tall, until next time. 

Suicide Prevention

if you think someone is at immediate risk of self-harm or hurting another person:

*Call 911 or your local emergency number 

*Stay with the person until help arrives 

*Remove any guns, knives, medications, or other things that may cause harm

*Listen, but don't judge, argue, threaten or yell

If you think someone is considering suicide, get help from a crisis or a suicide prevention hotline. Try the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 800-273-8255

Please take good care of yourselves, and each other. 

Cheers

Averi

Depression

  Hello dear readers and welcome or welcome back to my blog today I wanna focus on the topic of: depression I personally have walked a long winding road with depression, sometimes winning most time's losing, losing hope, losing time, losing friends, losing family, losing jobs, losing homes, losing myself, losing my grip on life, losing my will to live. I've walked the halls of so many psychiatric facilities I can't count them on my hands and toes and no I am not saying this to brag or to seek out some kind of sympathy I am merely trying to relate and offer guidance through dark turbulent times that happen in life, so if this is something that is affecting you in your everyday life then hopefully this post can help shed some light on this condition.

de-pres-sion

/de'preSH(e)n/

noun

Feelings of severe despondency and dejection.

Examples: Melancholy, misery, sadness, gloom, woe, sorrow, despair.

"self-doubt creeps in and that swiftly turns to depression"

What Causes Depression?

Depression is not a condition that a specific cause. It can happen for many different reasons and have many different triggers usually, depression doesn't doesn't work quickly or suddenly instead, it develops over long periods of time and can lead to a series of "downward spirals" 

 The four major causes of depression are:

*1. Family History | though there are no specific genes that we can look at and trace to depression, if your family members have had depression, you are more likely also to experience depression. The jury is still out on whether, or not this link is due to learned behavior or biology. 

*2. Illness and Health Issues | Physical illnesses or injuries can have a significant impact on your physical health and mental health. Chronic health issues, long term health issues, or physical health issues that drastically change your lifestyle can cause depression. Often, your doctors will understand this and recommend a mental health treatment as a part of your overall treatment. Issues connected to your brain, hormones, menstrual cycle or menopause, low blood sugar or sleep problems can be very impactful. 

*3. Medication. Drugs, and Alcohol | Many different medications can have the unfortunate side effect of depression. If you feel depressed after starting a new medicine or medication, you should research it's side effects or talk to your doctor. There could be a better alternative your doctor could give you alternatively. Additionally, recreational drugs and alcohol use can cause or worsen depression. While they may initially feel like they help symptoms of depression, they will make you feel worse eventually. 

*4. Personality | Some people and personalities are just more apt to experience depression. For example, people who tend to hold in worries, are perfectionists, and are sensitive to criticism are naturally more likely to be depressed. 

Additional causes of depression 

In addition to those causes, two of the more abstract causes of depression can be: 

Life Events | It has been found through research that life events can increase your chance of being depressed. Examples of events like this include:

* Losing your job 

* Being in a dysfunctional relationship 

* Stress at work

* Isolation

* Going through a breakup or divorce 

* Being diagnosed with an illness

* Being unemployed for a long period of time 

* Grieving a loved one (in any way) 

While negative life events or divorce can cause depression, they don't necessarily always cause it. Often, it is more about how you deal with these difficult situations.

And then there's....

Chemicals in the Brain 

Brain chemistry is a vastly complex  and developing field of study. There is much that is still being researched in addition, there are so many other factors besides simple brain chemistry that can lead to depression. Therefore, depression is not merely caused by a lack of certain chemicals, However there are specific processes between nerve cells that can contribute to depression.

Treatments for Depression 

Many of the medications used to treat depression target the brains messaging centers. Some stimulate serotonin or noradrenaline production. In addition, some treatments like transcranial magnetic stimulation (TMS) or electroconvulsive therapy (ECT) are used to treat depression because they also targets the brain's messaging processes. However, these types of treatments are only used when therapy, lifestyle changes, social change and medication have not helped. 

A more definitive list of treatments for depression is;

*Self-Guided changes to your lifestyle | Simply changing things like your sleep cycle, how you spend your time, and other daily habits can do a lot to improve your depression. 

*Therapy | Beginning counseling, therapy or psychotherapy, with a mental health provider can help you better understand, and cope with your feelings while having someone to talk them through with. You can do therapy for a short time or stay in it for extended periods of time, and due to Covid19 a lot places offer telehealth or zoom which is sometimes just easier.

*Alternative Therapies | Many people with mild depression can heighten their therapeutic experience by supplementing it with acupuncture, hypnosis or biofeedback. 

*Brain Stimulation | For people who suffer from severe depression or psychosis brain stimulation can be beneficial. As mentioned before, ECT or TMS are commonly prescribed. However, you can also try vagus nerve stimulation (VNS)

Of course every person's depression is unique to them. Because there is no broad spectrum for how depression can appear. The treatments can also vary person to person. Just know that there is also a wise spectrum for treatment and that it might take a try or two to find the one, or couple of treatments that are right for you. 

Symptoms

Although depression may occur once during your life, people typically have multiple episodes. During these episodes, these symptoms occur most of the day, nearly everyday and may include, but are not limited to: 

* Feelings of sadness, tearfulness, emptiness, or hopelessness

* Angry outbursts, Irritability or frustration, even over small matter

* Loss of interest or pleasure in most or all normal activities, such as sex, hobbies, or sports

* Sleep disturbances, including insomnia or sleeping too much

* Tiredness and lack of energy, so even small tasks take extra effort

* Reduced appetite and eight loss or increased cravings for food and weight gain

* Anxiety, agitation, or restlessness

* Slowed thinking, speaking or body movements

* Feelings of worthlessness or guilt, fixating on past failures or self-blame 

* Trouble thinking, concentrating, making decisions, and remembering things

* Frequent or recurrent thoughts of death, suicidal thoughts, suicide attempts or suicide

* Unexplained physical problems, such as back pain or headaches

15 Celebrities we tragically Lost to Depression / Mental Illness 

#1 Robin Williams 

#2 Marilyn Monroe 

#3 Dana Plato

#4 Kurt Cobain

#5 Chris Cornell

#6 Alexander McQueen

#7 Lee Thompson Young 

#8 Kate Spade 

#9 Anthony Bourdain

#10 Tony Scott 

#11 Don Cornelius 

#12 Mindy McCready

#13 Mac Miller 

#14 Chester Bennington 

#15 Misty Upham 

If you or anyone you know is suffering with depression you are not alone. If you are currently in crisis and need someone to speak with the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline can be reached at (800) 273-TALK (8255) or you can go to Lifeline

I hope you've enjoyed this read. I look forward to researching the next topic for you guys. 

Take good care of yourselves, and each other. 

Cheers, 

A 💕

Ableism

Hello Dear readers, and welcome or welcome back to my blog today I want to talk about ableism, What ableism is, what it looks like, what we can do to recognize it and avert ableism within our own lives so with that being said lets dive in with the definition of ableism. 

a-ble-ism

/'abe,lizem/

noun

discrimination in favor of able-bodied people. 

As social justice, equity, and inclusion permeate our collective consciousness, it's essential for advocates to remember another 'ism,' one that is frequently left out of conversations.

Ableism.

The world wasn't built with people with disabilities in mind, and because of that, the world we live in is inherently "ableist."

What is Ableism?

Ableism is the discrimination of and social prejudice against people with disabilities based on the belief that typical abilities are 'superior.' At it's heart, ableism is rooted in the assumption that disabled people require 'fixing' and defines people by their disability. Like racism and sexism, ableism classifies entire groups of people as 'less than.' and includes harmful stereotypes, misconceptions, and generalizations of people with disabilities. 

What does Ableism look like?

Ableism can take many forms including but not limited to: 

*Lack of compliance with disability rights laws like the ADA

*Segregating students with disabilities into separate schools 

*The use of restraint or seclusion as a means of controlling students with disabilities 

*Segregating adults and children with disabilities in institutions 

*Failing to incorporate accessibility into building design plans

*Buildings without braille on signs, elevator buttons, etc. 

*The assumption that people with disabilities want or need to be 'fixed'

*Using disability as a punchline, or mocking people with disabilities 

*Refusing to provide responsible accommodations 

But...what about 'everyday' or minor ableism? what does that look like? 

*Choosing an inaccessible venue for a meeting or event, therefore excluding some participants

*Using someone else's mobility device as a hand or foot rest

*Framing disability as either tragic or inspirational in news stories, movies and other popular forms of media.

*Casting a non-disabled actor to play a disabled character in a play, movie, TV show or commercial

*Making a movie that doesn't have audio description or closed captioning 

*Using the accessible bathroom stall (I am sooo guilty) when you are able to use the non-accessible stall without pain or risk of injury

*Wearing scented products in a scent-free environment

*Talking to a person with a disability like they are a child, talking about them instead of directly to them, or Speaking for them

*Asking invasive questions about the medical history or personal life of someone with a disability 

*Assuming people have to have a visible disability to actually be disabled 

*Questioning if someone is 'actually' disabled, or 'how much' they are disabled

*Asking, "How did you become disabled"

What are ableist micro-aggressions?

Micro-aggressions are everyday verbal or behavioral expressions that communicate a negative slight or insult in relation to someone's gender identity, race, sex, disability, etc. 

Examples include, but of course are not limited to: 

*"That's so lame"

*"You are so retarded"

*"That guy is crazy!"

*"You're acting so bi-polar right now"

*(my personal favorite)" Are you off your meds?"

*"It's like the blind leading the blind"

*"My ideas fell on deaf ears"

*"She's such a psycho"

*"I'm like, super OCD about how I clean my apartment"

*"Can I pray for you?"

*"I'll pray for you"

*"I don't even think of you as disabled"

Phrases like this imply that a disability makes a person less than, and that disability is bad. Negative, a problem to be fixed, rather than a normal, inevitable part of the human experience. Many people don't mean to even be insulting, most are just uneducated and a lot have good intentions however even well-meant comments and actions can take a serious toll on their recipients.

What can we do to recognize and avert ableism?

*Believe people when they disclose a disability 

*Similarly, don't accuse people of 'faking' their disability

*Listen to people when they request an accommodation

*Don't assume you know what someone needs  

*Never touch a person with a disability or their mobility equipment without their CONSENT

*Keep invasive questions to yourself

*Don't speak on behalf of someone with a disability unless they explicitly ask you to

*Talk about disability with children and young people 

*Incorporate accessibility into your event planning

*Learn more about being a good disability ally at this website #Allies

Thanks for taking your valuable time to sit here with me today and talk about this, while it's not talked about as much as it should be in much of today's media I am always looking for what others are missing, so I can inform you guys and we can continue growing a greater, loving tomorrow together. 

Take good care of yourselves and each other, until next time.

Cheers,

A 💕

Domestic Violence

   Hello Dear readers, and welcome or welcome back. Before I get going on today's topic I would just like to take a moment to recognize Martin Luther King Jr. and all he stood for. As we remember him today as a motivational speaker, a man who was ahead of his time, and someone who cared for the rights of others. I think it's remarkable how one person can spark such a wildfire in the lives of humans, so today let's honor him and remember him for the gentle kind loving person that he was. -- 

 Now with that being said today I would really like to focus on domestic violence. It is an epidemic within our society and it has only gotten worse, and worse as the years continue on. I myself am a victim of domestic violence, I have feared for my life multiple times, but there are ways out and there is help. First things first lets break it down and collect some knowledge on domestic violence.

do-mes-tic vi-o-lence

noun

violent or aggressive behavior within the home, typically involving the violent abuse of a spouse or partner. 

What is Domestic Violence?

Domestic abuse, also called "domestic violence" or "intimate partner violence", can be defined as a pattern of a behavior in any relationship that is used to gain or maintain power and control over an intimate partner. Abuse is physical, sexual, emotional, economic or psychological actions or threats of actions that influence another person. This includes any behaviors that frighten, intimidate, terrorize, manipulate, hurt, humiliate, blame, injure, or wound someone. Domestic violence can happen to anyone of any race, age, sexual orientation, religion, or gender. It can occur within a range of relationships including couples who are married, living together or dating. Domestic violence affects people of all socioeconomic backgrounds and education levels. Anyone can be a victim of domestic violence, regardless of age, race, gender, sexual orientation, faith or class!. Victims of domestic violence may also include a child or other relative, or any other household member. Domestic violence is typically manifested as a pattern of abusive behavior toward an intimate partner in a dating or family relationship, where the abuser exerts power and control over the victim. Domestic violence can be mental, physical, economic or sexual in nature. Incidents are rarely isolated, and usually escalate in frequency and severity. Domestic violence may culminate in serious physical injury or death to the victim or the abuser depending on the severity of the abuse, and the situation. 

Are You Being Abused?

Look over the following questions to think about how you are being treated and how you, yourself treat your partner.

Recognizing the signs of domestic violence:

Does your partner...

*Embarrass or make fun of you in front of your friends or family?

*Put down your accomplishments? 

*Make you feel like you are unable to make decisions?

*Use intimidation or threats to gain compliance?

*Tell you that you are/would be nothing without them?

*Treat you roughly-- grab, push, pinch, shove or hit you?

*Call you several times a night or show up to make sure you are where you said you would be?

*Use drugs or alcohol as an excuse for saying hurtful things or abusing you?

*Blame you for how they feel or act?

*Pressure you sexually for things you aren't ready for?

*Make you feel like there is "no way out" of the relationship?

*Prevent you from doing things you want - like spending time with friends or family?

*Try to keep you from leaving after a fight or leave you somewhere after a fight to "teach you a lesson"?

Do You...

*Sometimes feel scared of how your partner may behave?

*Constantly make excuses to other people for your partner's behavior?

*Believe that you can help your partner change if only you can change something about yourself?

*Try not to do anything that would cause conflict or make your partner upset?

*Always do what your partner wants you to do instead of what you want?

*Stay with your partner because you are afraid of what would happen if you broke up?

If any of these things are happening in your relationship, talk to someone. Without help, the abuse WILL continue. Making that first step is hard, but rewarding. 

For Survivors

No one deserves to be abused. The abuse is not your fault. You are not alone. 

Contact the Critical Incident Stress Management Unit (CISMU) if you are concerned that you may be experiencing any form of abuse or are in fear for the safety of yourself or your children. If English is not your first language, you can request a language you feel more comfortable speaking when contacting CISMU. If you do not feel comfortable speaking on the phone with someone or you are in a situation where you can't there is the The National Domestic Violence Hotline, and you can speak to someone 24/7 seven days a week. Also the thing I like the most about this website is that at pressing the escape key at anytime puts you out of their webpage and back to Google, so in the case that your abuser walks in on you planning you're exit strategy you would easily have a way to make it look like you were just Googling something here is the web link :  https://www.thehotline.org/get-help/

For Abusive Partners 

If you recognize that you are mistreating your partner, there may be resources in your community to assist you to end the abuse. National Domestic Violence Hotline has a number of resources that can assist while this is a US Hotline, the advice and information may be useful no matter where you live. Understand that domestic violence is not only against the United States code of conduct, but you may be subject to criminal prosecution under the law that is applicable. 

If you are surviving in an abusive relationship, or if you are the abuser get help. Talk to someone. No one is worth living your life suffocating in pain.. I know that in this moment you might be thinking that you're in love, but love doesn't look like any of the things we have discussed today. There will come someone that will love you in the way that you deserve to be loved. 

Hopefully with this information I have been able to reach someone hurting, save someone from a painful relationship and allow someone to open their hearts to a new world of love, real love and possibilities. 

Blessings --

A

Emotional Intelligence

  Hello Dear Readers and welcome or welcome back, today I wanna focus on the topic of emotional intelligence and how we can either work on straightening our own or growing new skills to develop the techniques and tools to gain more emotional intelligence. With that being said let's jump back in!.

  Emotional Intelligence

e-mo-tion-al  in-tel-li-gence

noun

the capacity to be aware of, control, and express one's emotions, and to handle interpersonal relationships judiciously and empathetically.

 5 Ways to Boost Your Emotional Intelligence

1. Become aware of and tune into your own emotions. 

one of the first, and perhaps most important steps, is to become more self aware, or to develop the ability to tune into your own emotions. Why? In order to control your emotions you must first be aware of them. Some pointers for becoming self aware include: monitoring your emotions by acknowledging them (a technique I really like is RAINN) knowing yourself is an essential life skill. Practicing mindfulness is also an excellent way to become more self aware and monitor your emotions, By being aware of your own emotions, you are better able to understand and become aware of the emotions of others.

2. Seek to understand the points of view of others. 

Once you have a good appraisal of your own emotions, seek to understand and empathize with others. This is particularly important in the workplace, on committees, or in a group setting where ideas are flowing and being exchanged. To do so, listen attentively, put yourself in another's place and try to imagine what they thinking and feeling and how they may have arrived at their conclusions. You will not only have a broader viewpoint yourself, you will be stretching your own perspective.

3. Communicate Effectively.

Communicating effectively requires both verbal and non-verbal skills. Communication is more than merely exchanging information. Effective communication is about understanding emotions, as well as the intentions behind the information exchanged. It is mutual back and forth that includes conveying a message in the way it is intended and, in turn, making sure it is received as intended.

Non-verbal skills include engage listening, making eye contact, being aware of body language (not standing too close, gestures, facial expressions, etc.)

4. Develop connections with people.

No matter how shy or introverted you think you are, learning to develop connections with others is a huge component of Emotional Intelligence. In fact, even if you are shy, you can begin first by listening, showing interest and making others feel comfortable. Doing so is sometimes easier for shy, introverted people (like myself) than it is for gregarious, extroverts who tend to enjoy speaking first. For both types, showing that you care and are interested in others goes far in building valuable connections.

5. Practice emotional management.

Once you are aware of both your own emotions and those of others, it is important to understand how to keep them and in check. Some ways of practicing emotional management include:

*Stopping to take time to process and understand what is transpiring 

*Diverting your attention until you are more composed - such as going for a walk, exercising, playing with a pet, breathing deeply or using RAINN

*Re-framing the experience, i.e. exploring a new, broader way of looking at the issue.

*Looking at the big picture and determining how important the immediate emotion/reaction is to the overall issue.

There are several ways you can begin to go about boosting, or improving your Emotional Intelligence. Doing so will not only enhance your opportunities for success in the workplace, it will benefit you in your personal and professional relationships. Ultimately, Emotional Intelligence entails understanding yourself and others, effectively interacting with others, and then using those skills to straighten your personal and professional relationships. I hope with this blog, I have been able to inform you of how to boost your own Emotional Intelligence, and reach for your goals this new year with the infinite potential I know that we all have. 

Take good care of yourselves and each other, 

until next time. 

Blessings,

-A